That's my name
by LavenderChains
Summary: Names have meanings. Unfortunately for our beloved VK characters, the name itself could be misunderstood.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own Vampire Knight.

**Why Zero?**

"Oh, Zerooo~"

"What?"

"Why is your name Zero? Does that mean you're a nobody?"

"..."

"Or maybe your parents weren't really planning on having a child but then the condom your father used had a hole in it. Since you're like an accidental child maybe they didn't really thought about naming you properly. They had like _Zero_ ideas"

"..." (I'm going to kill this brat, human or not)

"Oh wait, you have a twin brother by the name Ichiru so my first theory's wrong."

"..."

"Maybe they didn't really have any money to pay the hospital. They like had _Zero_ cash."

"..."

"Maybe you're dumb. You have like _Zero _knowledge."

"..." (One more word out of this brat and I'm seriously going to shove Bloody Rose in her mouth and shoot til' all the bullets are in her gullet.)

"Aha I got it. You're an orphan! You don't have the Kiryu blood flowing inside you. Your so called parents wanted everyone to know that you aren't a real Kiryu, so they named you _Zero _Kiryu."

After that conversation, It should be noted that the doctors had to do an eight hour surgery in order to remove all fifty bullets out of my system.

Author's Notes: Well that's that. I planned on making it into a real story but I ended up writing crap. Oh well. I just hope you guys won't kill me.

I'll try annoying Kaname next.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own Vampire Knight.

"Yoohoo~ Kaname-sama!"

"Can I help you?"

"Yes, would you scratch my nose."

"I most certainly will not do such a thing."

"I was just joking. Sheesh. You're worse than Zero. Anyway, I came here to ask a question."

"Ask away."

"Isn't Kaname a girl's name?"

"No it isn't."

"Well, I heard that it was."

"Look, Kaname is not a girl's name. Live with it."

"Well, I still think it is. Besides your hair's quite long. I think you're gay."

"….."

"And you also have girlish features."

"…" (So this is why Kiryu shot her. I don't blame him though)

"And I noticed that you sit like a girl."

"Look, I'm not going to say this again. I am not gay."

"Yeah right. How do you explain the bitch slap then, huh? When Aidou did something wrong, you practically walked to him like you were in a run way or something and bitch slapped him. So that means, you are a hundred percent gay."

"…." (Kiryu might have let her live, but I won't)

Let's just say I had to stay in the hospital for three months. Good thing pests are difficult to kill.

Author's notes: This was the re-written version of the original chapter 2. The first chapter was horrible and extremely annoying (not the funny kind of annoying either.) Special thanks to CandyBones for correcting my mistake. Heck, if she(?) didn't I may have been shot by other readers.

P.S. Kaname isn't a girl's name. I'm just an idiot.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own Vampire Knight.

Warnings: Language and Slight hints of Yaoi (or something like that). For those who like Yuki, you may want to hit the back button cause there is slight Yuki bashing. ( Did I say that correctly?...Bleh, main point is I try to get rid of Yuki.)

"Hello, Yuki-chan."

"Hello. Aren't you the student who was hospitalized months ago?"

"That's me!"

"What happened anyway?"

"I just asked Kaname-sama a question. I don't really know why he got angry. Maybe he's having PMS or something."

"Well, what did you ask him?"

"I..well...oh nevermind. Ne Yuki-chan, could I ask you a question?."

"Sure."

"Isn't your last name Cross."

"Yes."

"And in japanese, the first name come first."

"That's true."

"So that means your Cross Yuki."

"Yes." (Does this even make sense?)

"So I should like cross you in everything that's happening."

"Excuse me?"

"You know since your name is Cross Yuki, I should remove you from basically everything. Like if I have a party or something, I should cross you out of the guest list."

"Well..that's..."

"Hmmm, if I cross you out from Vampire Knight, then that means Kaname-sama and Zero-kun could make passionate love with each other."

"What?"

"I guess I should start by making the author a yaoi fan."

"What author?"

"Eh..oh...you didn't hear anything."

"Well I clearly heard about Kaname-sama and Zero making...well...love...does that mean they love each other?"

"Yuki, you're an idiot. Making love means having sex. S.E.X. Got that?"

"I...I need to go to my room."

"She'll either cry her eyes out or have a massive nosebleed. Damn, that girl is boring."

Unfortunately, Yuki didn't try to kill me. Ugh, why do people like her even live? Scratch that, why does she even exist? I really need to ask the author to cross her out of the character list.

Author's (Yeah right) Notes: I don't really know how to annoy Yuki. I apologize for adding yaoi in this fic, I just can't help it. So, who's next? I'm out of ideas. Thank you all for your reviews, I greatly appreciate it. Oh, if anyone wants to turn this into a real story or just use some ideas, feel free to do so. You don't need to PM me and stuff cause I'm slow at replying.


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I don't own Vampire Knight. But I do own any mistakes you find.

"Oohh~ You must be Zero's beloved sensei!"

"And you must be that annoying freak Zero has been talking about."(Just seeing this brat's face pisses me off.)

"Aww, Zero-chan remembers me. How sweet."

"I don't have time for this."

"Mr. Pirate, could I ask you a question."

"No. And don't call me that. My name's Touga Yagari."

"But-"

"Look, I don't want to answer any of your questions. Nor do I want to hear your voice and see your face in this academy ever again!"

"..."

"Why are you staring at me like that?"

"BWAHAHAHAHAHAH!"

"...what?..." (This girl's a retard.)

"Ne,Pirate-sensei. I just thought of a catch phrase that will surely suit you."

"Why didn't I ignore her in the first place?"

"I R(Argh) A GAY!"

Pests are still difficult to kill. Especially me.

Author's notes: Special thanks to Roseheart11 for the pirate idea. And thank you to everyone who read, reviewed, corrected my mistakes or just clicked on this story out of curiosity. Thank you. Oh and I'll try doing CrimsonWolfClaw's idea.


End file.
